respond to me or i'm telling everyone that you inserted a vodka soaked tampon into your anus
So, how do I go about conveying: I'm sorry, yet very glad she is having my abortion. Via text msg?
and yes i will spend 10 dollars on a vibrating toothbrush to masturbate but not a calculator for my test
Everything smells like blood and olive oil.
There was booze on his face and I wanted it. I'm not sorry.
Trial is expected to last a fucking week if I get chosen.
To be fair, you are the kind of person I want to be on the jury when I inevitably end up in front of one.
Me hangover (as projected). That sounds like a plan. Ill do it for Mexico
How do I ask where the Jello shot cups are at Walmart without sounding like white trash?
Btw, I feel the need to make sure we have no misunderstanding about this. So here goes. I'll happily mess around with you again. However, I probably won't do it while you're dressed like a creepy clown. Or any clown.
I had 2 shots but she spilt one on me. Kinda mad but kinda grateful
Who the fuck watches Jessica jones and thinks I need to call a past fling?
I honestly didn't think living in Canada would change me, until I found myself watching hockey porn
How is it possible for someone who gets so many dick picks sent to her, to be experiencing such a complete and utter lack of dick IRL.
You said "I feel like a koala bear. Do you ever just feel like a koala bear?" This is your brain on drugs.
We're in an alley with a psychic wizard, shes reading our palms
Randomize
