so I found out that he is the older brother of a friend of mine from high school
awkward
no it got awkward about 40mins later when he invited me to stay the night...with him and his girlfriend.
my 3 year old cousin just woke up screaming "IT WON'T GO DOWN!'
I've done 29 out of the 30 things to do to a naked man according to Cosmo. I don't know if that makes me innovative or slutty.
Genius.
I just found $40 in the jeans I wore last night. PS I also found the jeans I wore last night.
boy from dating site added me on facebook. i don't know if i'm ready for him to see what a drunk i am.
I found out that my first kiss was an Italian. Even in kindergarden i knew size mattered.
You "were" hungover, which is past tense. So that gives you no excuse not to go out tonight.
This girl has a mullet weave. I missed oakland.
I dont care what I am for halloween, as long as i'm not a father after
I am wrecking havoc on the skinny girls by going home with the big one. She is taking me to see her dog now.
Hooked up with a guy resembling a bearded Cher. I need the lenses on my beer goggles fixed. Pronto.
You started pulling out condoms from your fanny pack and threw them at all the couples on the beach
Sorry my phone died because I decided charging my vibrator was way more important
Kid walks in and orders 24 Mcdoubles and 14 large fries, as he's handing me the money he tells me he lost at rock paper scissors so he had to do the munchie run.
Now the fun stuff starts.
Someone is losing a finger.
Randomize
