i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
better question... why wasnt i wearing a cape the previous 20 years of my life???
Apparently shes in the bathroom puking but eating a pot roast she found in the fridge at the same time.
He gave me an orgasm with his left hand...and he's right handed. Of course he's a keeper.
It'd be like medium rare by now.
I love how we're talking about your vagina like it's a piece of meat.
woke up to the trail of sugar cubes leading to my bed........was i that uncooperative last night
My brother just asked if I would keep having one nighters with that guy because he really likes the organic cotton v-necks he leaves behind.
when someone at the bar asked you a question all you knew how to say was "chug-a-lug"
My way of showing team usa support, bronze: handy silver: bj gold: home run. God, I'm patriotic
You kept chewing on the empty milk carton and saying "kitty" over and over again. It was an interesting night.
I'm getting high with a 50 year old car wash guy. Enough said.
Do you ever get high and look at your cat and feel like you know them on an intellectual level?
I just have to decide what I love more, food or dick.
We're playing drunken roulette. We're taking exlax followed by shots. First person to shit themselves loses!
I just bartered a blowjob for the ex-fiancée's engagement ring. FTW!
Randomize
