a slip n slide in 50degree weather was the 2nd dumbest thing i have ever done. the 1st was hitting the wooden fence i believed was supposed to "help us stop"
You were in the bathroom for two hours practicing "Revenge Faces".
i cant wait for all this BS that is happening with Tiger to happen to Tebow
Somewhere out there, someone is getting laid. And then theres me, watching Star Trek porn while my roommate plays World of Warcraft next door
I sat down with you and helped you write your will last night. I was THAT convinced that you weren't waking up.
Oh and you pulled your pants down outside in front of like five people, held my hand, then peed.
It's cheaper then a lap dance and you get your hair cut.
Also I climbed atop a mailbox with a toilet paper hat and a wolverine claw made of glowsticks, screaming at passers-by that they were going to die. Control me
I'm sorry i ruined our friendship with a boner
She lost her glasses and we found them on the roof. Don't ask questions. Kings cup was intense last night.
I only had ten dollars. So leave it to Katie to somehow makeout with the bartender, on his shift mind you, and get free drinks.
I just watched this dude try to convince this girl to go home with him. She was like, That's cute, you're cute.and she just walked away. Man I'm so not drunk enough to be around this level of sad.
What a weekend. It started with me realizing i might not be straight and ended with me spraining my foot.
Julius Caesar had a huge penis
WTF are you reading?
Ha ha! No, the guy in the Caesar costume last night. We hooked up. His dick was huge
I know he’s married, but he’s still a guy with balls and a dick. He noticed my cleavage and stared at my ass. He’ll call.
Randomize
