i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
if i see another status about New Moon, i'm gonna punch a baby
driving around with you guys listening to the beach boys made me very concious of how white you all are.
If I have to go to the hospital can we stop by the liquor store on the way?
well my dad not being home definitely made it less awkward to walk in carrying the bra I left wearing.
There are not enough shots in the world for this. We walked in and they shouted "the pilgrims are here!" And then someone handed me a turkey leg the size of my arm.
I spiked my fruit smoothie. Taking bikini season diet to a whole new level
He whinnies like a horse when he's cumming. I wish I would have known this before we got into a relationship.
In the UK. Bar special, every drink costs a pound. I'm two shots away from being deported. God save the queen.
no drinking for a week
if by week you mean tonight and by no you means yes
Don't get me wrong, I love talking about lube and such, but why are we?
That's a lot of people she's fucked in one picture.
That pizza at 1 am literally tasted like I was eating an angel
She picked me up from the bar in her underwear.
You ran into the tattoo shop screaming PIERCE MY TITIES
Randomize
