Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
I dont ever wanna see you tell my little brother to "spread the seed" ever again
yeah he didnt know till after their one year. You have no idea how bad i wanna say "dude i sucked on those boobs before you"
I just had to take a drug test for my new job. I should have asked them if they could tell me if I were pregnant or not while they were at it and save me the guesswork.
I hid a girl's boot last night so I could ransom it back this morning via the "blowjobs for boots" program.
okay, this game isn't funny anymore. tell us where all the forks are.
when he was about to finish he told me to avert my eyes and keep my lady parts away. chivalry isnt dead.
A homeless man walked up to me at the bar, pointed, and told me to get my shit together. Jesus?
Don't mean to be rude. But did you, by any chance, cut down a tree from my neighbors backyard last night? And did you also drag it to my yard and burn it?
Just found a note from Saturday that says "rainy soft hair".... Any ideas?
We decided to make playlists for each other. Do you know any songs that say "sorry I'm not as hot as your prostitute ex?"
YOUR DICK HAS BEEN IN ME I DO NOT WANT TO BE SET UP TO MEET YOUR FRIENDS
Growing a beard is gonna make smoking a pipe look so much more majestic
FINE. BE CELIBATE AND ACCUMULATE CATS. SEE IF I CARE.
After drinking all day I popped an adderal, slammed three beers in a row, apparently told the bartender "thanks bitch" then ran on stage.
Randomize
