This is a mass text. Does anyone know what the hell the asian woman at the end of Napoleon Dynamite is doing in the movie
Just ate lunch with a paperclip again. Seriously, need to invest in plastic forks.
She's the only one so far who hasn't laughed at me naked.... I'm gonna marry her.
I almost punched the night nurse in her face. I woke up and she was standing over me.
its not fair. if i was a guy, i'd be getting a high five for banging two in one night.
After much deliberation I've decided to name my penis "Arthur", hope your mom's surgery goes well.
I may or may not juuuust be reaching the point where I find some humor from waking up in the parking lot at the standard.
Dude I just ripped my new jeans climbing out the window so his booty call wouldn't realize I was home. Being his roommate should come with hazard pay
Side note... I would pay good money to have witnessed the reaction of onlookers as I sprinted down Armtiage with a 15 lb bag of peanuts under my arm
I don't know. I wanna do you but I also want a cheeseburger.
I'm like a hairless cat ready to be ravished
He just got out of surgery, almost died from shooting him self with an arrow.
My cats name is now jello shot. How much do you love me right now?
I really regret not asking “like a cupcake” when you asked me to eat your ass
i think i passed out for a few seconds while we were having sex but he didnt notice...
Randomize