You flung your panties at that guy you liked with an accuracy that I have never seen before.
He literally had no idea who I was, so he made me turn around 360 degrees and when he saw my ass, he blurted out my first AND last name.
i am already firmly committed to doing irish carbombs w/ 12 different people, and the st pattys day party doesnt start for another 24 hours. i may die
she was passed out on the moving sidewalks in the airport, we NEED to travel more often
Sometimes I seriously wonder if I could get away with vodka Sundays at work. Cuz this red bull feels naked.
Drinking with a woman who gave an anti-drugs speech at my high school. Somehow, not surprised.
Minus the pink eye. Do I look fuckable tonight?
I don’t know what's weirder; the fact that I weigh more with an erection..or the fact that I actually weighed myself with an erection...
A girl told me I was her "alcohol spirit animal" tonight. Somehow I think my whole life was secretly building up to this moment
If its possible to have a hickey on your nipple, I have one. Thank you.
I think we might have a drinking problem when the ASU kids called us crazy
No one made them take a shot with us at the 12 hour mark. That's their bad
We're eating jello shots in the library. I love the day after Valentine's
Willing booties have sort of a tractor beam for me.
Do it break your family into faction start a civil war
I danced my ass off after the funeral last night. Kept dropping it low and I can feel it in my legs today. Im like shit I needa go work out
What a way to honor the dead
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