I told her I was pledging and she immediately proposed to give me head in the bathroom. i love how easy rushees are
Is it because I queefed?
I'm in my winter jacket and nothing else. very drunk. bring bitches.
That glade motion activator thing keeps going off every time we pass the bong. I don't know what I'm getting high off right now.
I just remembered I opened the taxi door when I was at a red light last night and puked. And then when I was done I closed the door and told him he may proceed with caution.
You know, he picked a really shitty time to stop sleeping with me to pay attention to his girlfriend.
I seriously might throw up right now. In class. Sunglasses on. I'm getting too old for this.
A blow job from a tiger shark would still entail less risk to your genitals than having sex with her.
Can we just discuss how hundreds of miles away we were both beyond drunk and in some boys bed. That is the definition of friendship.
how the hell were we supposed to out run the cops in a bus?
unless you have a dick and you were thinking of chopping that off
Casually blacked out last night and apparently told him he couldn't come back to bed until he got me Taco Bell.
What'd I miss?
Erotic hypnosis and studded dog collars.
And our sex soundtracks thus far have been metal and Star Wars
I just broke into my house with a butter knife. It kinda scares me just how easy that was.
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