I'm playing with the baby I just found in your kitchen
this study room smells like vodka
the study room thinks the same about you
Three of the best words ever! Cocaine. Research. Study.
Your a horrible friend, i only tried to do the right thing by moving you off the floor.. that was not an invitation to puke all over my bed and attempt to use my dog to mop it up.
I drank entirely too much. My skin hurts to wear
we went from five shot glasses to three in one night. we lost 'badass' and gumbi, but the ninja turtle survived. courtney says to avoid any more casualties we're not allowed to use shot glasses past 1am. and we're not allowed to throw them
It's not a good hook up if during you're thinking "how will this damage me psychologically"
Is it acceptable to cry on a Friday or am I supposed to drink to forget it?
I'm more of a 'talk at me while I stare at you' kinda girl.
LinkedIn just suggested I might know the guy I caught my wife fucking.
SEX BINGO!
Canadian or clown?
I wish you could see all the crumbs in my bra....it looks like Hansel & Gretel got lost in my cleavage.
Somehow reaching for the flaming hot cheetos ended up in the best sex of my life
suburban family judging/laughing at us after Jenna just pulled two flasks out of her boot on the subway
I remember turning to Jon after doing a line of coke and saying "I was a Girl Scout"
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