Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
When you gave me the first bj i thought 'yep, this girl is going to do great things with her life'
Yea...coming from the girl who didn't understand why m&ms and tequila wasn't a "suitable diet"
I don't think the cop knew you were on ecstasy until you asked for a back rub.
Half of elefante. Gelafin galaxy
Care to explain why there is sushi in the soap dish in the bathroom
Hurry up and get here I'm judging myself
Pissed along side the highway while waving at all the traffic... if thats not a sign of a productive night to come then idk what is
Taking a shit on the side of the road is not how I imagined this morning would start.
I was grossed out that all their candles smelled like vagina and then I remembered where my fingers had been.
the fact that you trapped hornets in a mailing tube to put in his mailbox does not surprise me sadly.
Sooooooo, maybe just fucked on a motorcycle.
idk what to be more embarrassed/confused about, that i lost my underwear or that i woke up covered in fried rice
I just landed at Logan and some guy threw up in the baggage carousel. Boston never really changes
After everything I’ve done… had sex with people off tinder, gone to clubs and bars, gone to hockey games…. I get Covid at GRANDMAS HOUSE
Randomize
