Wow, your whole life is a joke regardless of the fact that its april fools day
You threw up. And every time you flushed you would wave and go "Bye Bye!" and then when the new water came you would greet it with "Helloooo!"
Hes the only one i know who can talk to a girl for an entire hour abuot the science in starwars and still get laid.
we were sitting in the bathtub when she came in with her grandpas cane adn beat us until lindsay passed out
gpnpr hd vmdd nm the ggrl whm was mn my lar
I need you to use more vowels.
He's still filling me in on the details. mid-table dance i asked to go water skiing?
Granted I did fall into a pond wearing your dress, but I did save a frog in the process so I think it was worth it.
If I don't have carpet burn in the morning you aren't trying hard enough.
I gave up yolo and cigarettes for lent. I owe god a sincere apology.
I just found out my college boyfriend's nickname is actually a Dutch word for little cucumber.....it all makes sense now.
I came home to him frying bacon to put in his beer. He said bacon beer lights, taste the awesomer rockies
My dick has a subreddit
No, Ethan, handcuffs and friendship bracelets are not "basically" the same thing.
Do you ever wake up and realize playing beer pong with your parents wasnt a dream? Your mom really beat you
Upstairs definitely just had sex while I wrote you love poetry. That was a fun experience 🤷🏻♀️
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