Is it weird if i grunt like Tim Taylor when im having sex AND grilling steaks??
So they discontinued the hummer... Now people will have to go door to door to let others know they're assholes
i like to finish this college football season knowing that not once have I had to masturbate to erin andrews
It's such a good feeling to send those "I'm not in jail" texts on Sunday morning
I think that the winner of this years fantasy football league should get naming rights to you child
He handled me like a finger puppet on crack... Time to ice the vagina, I'd like to sit down sometime today.
You just kept walking around saying "my brain is soup" then sat on the kitchen counter washing your feet. You bit the guy that tried to help you down
Wtf man. I knew she was bad news. No sane person cares if you eat their raviolli.
Also I just took a shit at a bar so always remember that ANYTHING is possible.
She's one of those people who could be either 16 or 23. In which case she's too old for me or in dangerously jailbait territory for you, bro.
Vacuum the place before you go out of town there are random glitter cocks everywhere
Your vagina is not a steamboat from the 1800's
Wake up. Smoke. Masturbate while eggos cook. Go back to bed. Smoke. Body spray shower. Beer with breakfast. Class. Morning of a champion.
He is a real estate investor who’s face I’m going to sit on.
I'm not big on drama but you need to put your pants on and leave.
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