what do you mean I googled how to give an awesome blow job?
I just want to get to the point in our relationship where I can get on top of her and fart and we can both laugh...not just me.
You know how you thought that you put on a condom last weel?
yea
turns out that you did...and i just found it.
just bought a $25 eighth from a chick who has a kid. i'm helping my community out right?
saturday- my day is open, my legs are not. you in?
well apparently not.
I just woke up with streamers wrapped around me. Glitter in my hair. My fish are swimming in empty bottles of Barcardi. Helpppp
Dude, she's just using you for your money, and Cavs tickets.
Honestly, what else do I have going for me?
You make a valid point.
right before he busted, he moaned the british are coming.
only on the fourth of july.
We'll probably be arrested for having a cheetah in our apartment anyway, so I say go for it.
Please tell me the foreign boys in the kitchen this morning were yours.
Are you considering all the consequences of doing your boss or are you just rationalizing with your vagina?
sriracha body shots, that's gonna be a thing
it's like you just said "i want you to suffer"
He probably thinks you're playing hard to get.
Hard to get?? I'm playing leave me the fuck alone.
My mom just said "okay girls, the ONLY thing i ask is that you stay sober Saturday afternoon, until halfway through lunch. And you don't wear that crystal camo hat. This is a funeral, not a tailgate party"
Best wishes.
will a lunchtime blow job make it better?
Randomize
