Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
Literally like 10 people walking in my building talking about how much they hate draco
We can get Dustin to help us. I think he'd be good at luring girls into a dark alley.
so when we were booking the hotel and plane tickets for vegas we reserved a chapel for someone, it's inevitable.
He was so bad, he was dry humping me and his dick was nowhere close to my vagina.
I woke up to the sound of a beer can being opened. I love him already
You're asking the wrong person. I was drunk on nyquil and jager.
i told them to call me paula dean as i was making all 10 for $10 boxes of pizza rolls in the microwave
98% is good enough for me. Kinda like birth control. Worth the risk
We were thinking he might be gay. Like how the fuck do you not even make out with a girl that made you a grilled cheese
Im going to make a sandwich and see if my books came from amazon. I cant believe two years ago i was dating eight guys and teaching russian exchange students how to do shots.
I wanted sex but got Ace Ventura: Pet Detective, instead. Then I had to drive 30 minutes home wet. Worst booty call, ever.
We can't stop being roommates, you do such a good job of holding my hair back when I puke. I don't wanna buy hair elastics.
Definitely just poured my beer into a McDonald's cup so I could walk through Walmart without judgment. 'Murica.
I know, dude. If he ends up having a tiny dick, I will literally pack it back into his pants and leave. Not worth the aggravation.
Randomize
