He finally told me that he's married. I guess it doesn't really matter.
you kept singing the copa cabana and saying HAVE A BANANA to random people on the street. you also went up to this poor short guy and hugged him while proceeding to yell I LOVE YOU CHILD MAN into his face. please tell me you're sober now
There is no way he is gay with that hair.
I just spent my lunch hour driving around campus yelling "TRADE LIVES WITH ME!" to all the freshmen moving in
doooooooo herrrrrrrrr
I'm out of practice. be my yoda
put your penis in her you must.
well now i know if i ever need to drive puke and talk on the phone at the same time i can
She said she didn't want me watching her give me a bj, so she proceeded to make a "blowjob igloo" out of blankets...
Good news.. I found out what I did Saturday night. Bad news... I found out what I did Saturday night.
Drinking franzia alone at noon watching a cheese themed episode of "The Chew" I'm ready to admit I need a job.
HOW ARE YOU ALWAYS DRUNK? AND WHERE ARE TOU TRYING TO GO??
He just told me what he wants for his birthday. "a noise complaint" he also said he wants to be the cause of all the noise but he won't be the one making the noise.
You would think the bank would reward me for getting my account down to 3 cents without overdrafting it.
he walked off and puked in the sand. then he made a sand castle over it so that "it wouldn't upset the kids"
Things change once you put a ring on it. 5 years ago if I had morning wood she would have gone nympho on that. Now I am just lucky if she touches it rolling when we sleep.
I refuse to take any type of advice let alone love advice from a motherfucker who is missing 3 fingers from a Fucked up masturbating accident.
Randomize
