What do you call a girl with PMS and GPS?
A crazy bitch that WILL find your ass!
She stuck a Big Gulp bend-y straw up his ass to see if he could handle anal.
Ew, and?!
Well he couldn't and the deal was he had to drink something using it afterwards.
We are two peas in an std pod
I'm sad your dog died... Her name is my stripper name.
Wait til she sees the pic of her vag in court docs.
I vaguely remember chanting "USA" at the pool when we were talking to the Frenchies.
We were pointing at fat people and chanting USA.
honestly i just want a cigarette and someone to go down on me... are you interested in helping with either of those
if memory serves, the guy you were hooking up with said he was a slutty skittle.
Seeing your one night stand on campus never gets less awkward. Why is Subway the only good place to eat?
I was peeing in the bathroom at this house party when a guy just casually stumbles out of the shower
I feel you. We can get adjoining rooms. It'll be like Disney world, but with drugs and ivs instead of roller coasters and Mickey Mouse.
Which is way cooler
I'm just gonna go with where the wind takes me. if it takes me to his dick, so be it.
PS there is a naked boy in my bed and I just left for the bar...
All i remember from last night was that i was sitting on the toilet for a good hour eating a philly cheesesteak hotpocket... then i woke up... in my bed.
i wish i could say that was the first 40 year old woman from the circus I nailed
Randomize