My friends, they love my intelligence
Partly cloudy chance of praying to the porcelin gods
Her vagina should come with caution tape.
Someone in my class is wearing shirt and on the back it says...National Bible Quiz Finalist 2006. Do you really expect me to find a guy here
he's drinking at 8 in the morning. it's going to be one of those "or else the terrorists have won" kinda days
Also I'd like you to set a calendar reminder that goes off every day for you to take 2 minutes to think about what your life would be like without me.
It's like if you got one of your titties chopped off...think of how much one would miss the other...that's how I feel when we're apart. A tit with no twin.
My vagina can tell he is in a metal band. I dont know if I can sit down.
I'm surprised I didn't lose anything last night. Except maybe my dignity but other than that we gucci.
When you're not at your house I assumed you're somewhere having sex
It bothers me when I see my old fuck buddies starting families on Facebook.
he just ran into my room in his giant penis costume yelling "supercock to the rescue"... I am still in total shock
I've slapped too many boys and done too many naked laps for it only to be 10:30pm
We are no longer allowed to make spur of the moment decisions about our love lives
ABSOLUTELY NOT
OMG OMG OMG!!!! I made his penis bleed!! I repeat I MADE HIS PENIS BLEED!!!!
Randomize