you guys were way drunker than both of me
Fun fact: he pulled out my nuva ring while he was fingering me.. he looked really confused at me and it a couple of times, so i just said "surprise! not only is it good for pleasure, it's also really handy for storing plastic toys." I'm thinking he's definately gonna call.
thats the last time I fuck a piece of fruit on camera for him.
If penises could fly, my ass would totally be an airport.
I feel like a combination of david goes to the dentist and drunkest guy ever goes for more beer
they made me velveta mac and cheese and fish. I wanna stay here the rest of my life
Why is there a shirtless guy in Walgreens and why is he probably looking for the same thing I am?
I think i can make this amish girl legitimately hot.
please don't go to jail. I'd hate to have to call the montgomery county jail every time I need sex advice
I need to have sex with you on our hotel room window ledge... This is a need not a request.
My worst case scenario tonight is that I fuck a hot Swiss girl. Let that give you perspective on my life at the moment.
at one point while they were drilling into my jaw I just remember thinking "will I ever be able to suck dick again"
Fuck you and your widespread penis snapchat
From the bottom of my heart, thanks for never sending me unsolicited dick picks.
there must be tiny pirates in the freezer stealing our rum.
Randomize
