i just rolled a joint on the giving tree. that book has given me so much.
Ifound a recepit for a hotel room in my sock. soo.. Ithink thats where my dog is.
Having drunken flash backs of me giving you a piggy back ride. I was like Jesus, and you were my cross. I fell so many times for you. This is true friendship.
Whatever dude, I don't feel bad about it. If my girlfriend finds out even SHE should give me a high five. That bitch was fine
And then the lady sheeps would bring me the finest grass to eat cuz im the sheep king and id have sexy smooth sheep fur
I'm in Burlington Coat Factory. This place'd be great if you were on E. There're so many textures...
I'm kinda hoping that if I rub the right object, a genie will come out
I puked in my fridge last night while I was trying to get water
I smell like gasoline and adventure.
2048oz a keg...divide that by solo cup... comes out to 128 beers...simplifies into 5.3repeating cases...drinkable between two people
and u failed math?
Is it bad if one of my goals right now is to snort blow through a licorice?
Don't answer that. It is bad.
I just stuck my fingers down her throat so she could puke. I mean what are friends for
Oh my god she just threw up on her dog
Btw I did not technically have a dick in me but I was naked in bed with a man during the last finals game so that is why the Warriors won
What am I doing? I'm usually only attracted to horrible people.
Chasing down vodka with apple juice and crying. Alone.
Actually, my eyes didn't start bleeding until the next day. So it was a pretty awesome night overall.
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