What was that guy's name that you dated that wore the leotard?
I woke up this AM and all of my clothes i wore last night are gone. Instead i am dressed in air jordans, boxers, cargo shorts, and an Affliction t-shirt. the part that upsets me most is that i was with a guy who wears Affliction t-shirts.
Most fantastic sex ever until her Doberman took an interest in what we were doing. There was nothing more terrifying then feeling warm dog breath on my ballsack.
Party at my house. Liquor pinata. Your presence is required.
Our adventure is going to pick up his pipe and weed that he ditched when he got pulled over the other day.
HOT DATE.
she is using a fork to eat popcorn and refuses to drink gatorade out of anything but a margarita glass... did i mention the popcorn is on a plate?
he came on my stomach and it was 1000 degrees in his car. i smelled awesome.
So yes, he's hot, a scorpio, an artist and a perfect cock. I think my bi train just arrived in gay town.
Nothing bad can happen when you have a kiwi flavored condom. Absolutely nothing.
For the sake of being nice I congratulated her and she replied with something along the lines of that I need to stay away from him and not touch him ever. I really wanted to be like "been there, done that" but my New Years resolution was to not start any cat fight over boys with small dicks before noon
Ive never seen a drunk man get suplexed before last week, now its the standard requirement every time we go out.
My puke in the shower morning just turned into a puke in the restroom at work afternoon. I'm the human embodiment of dumpster fire.
I hooked up with a guy named Quan.. I literally hit the Quan
I feel like I shouldn't be left around 30 year olds when I'm drunk
I've had more orgasms than showers this week.
Randomize
