Well apparently he's into motor boating.
when she said she would show you her other bow, she ment she wanted you to bend her over and see the tattoo on her lower back you idiot
My insides feel lik shag carpet. It is awesome
so, not only did she give him head while i was asleep next to them, apparently, it was bad head...
Are you serious?
yeah... as often as she does that, you'd think she'd be good at it...
I need to sleep with 3 more guys by midnight to meet my 2010 resolution..
we need to drink more beer. the fridge wont close.
You gave the cab driver your pants as collateral while you ran in the house for money.
thanks for the bloody nose. you probably dont remember, i'm not mad.. only because your boobs are to blame
My new hangover cure is going for a haircut, just so the stylists give me a scalp massage during the shampoo.
That certainly explains the nine times your hair has looked different just this last month alone.
As I was throwing up blood I assured concerned onlookers that I had simply "eaten a lot of ketchup today"
We found her on the balcony debating if it was easier to jump or throw up. Neither decision would not have been good for the 91 year old below us.
Dude this weed smells so good they should make it into a Vicks vapor rub scent and I would rub it all over myself.
So...guess who had sex tied to the ladder of a caboose under the stars in Joshua Tree? This bitch
I've been watching porn with my cat lately. No shame
On a brighter more disgusting note...... I think I just shart myself but I'm too afraid to find out.
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