Dont worry, she is sitting right next to me. She is making it clear she wants to scissor
PS: the photo I uploaded for this internship site is the same one i used for my fake ID. I like to keep it classy.
TRUE LIFE: my roommate is growing a bush.
better yet, TRUE LIFE: my roommates boyfriend begged her to grow a bush.
just as they were cutting his pants off he made em stop & said "everyone knows about shrinkage right".
I didnt think the feeling of accomplishment for fucking brothers would be this great.
The wizard has you scheduled for a 6am sex breakfast
I'm so there
he just kept texting even after we lit his shoelaces on fire. he just calmly walked into the pool... still texting.
We were sitting outside of the building and he literally just walked up with no pants on. This is the best college ever
Tried to shave my legs but the rug burn on my knees from last night got in the way.
I lost a bet last night, now I have to name the baby Fetty Wap, regardless of gender. Riley is going to kill me.
I woke up on the green space outside our dorm cradling a watermelon and sucking my thumb. College is crazy man.
Sorry about my sloppy drunk texts. I'm not sure talking about banging a near dead Jimmy Stewart was my finest moment
Not to be gross and awkward, but I just had sex outside in the rain on the hood of a lexus
Whatever he got a sick blow job and his high school fantasy was fulfilled
And that's what dreams are made of
*hilary duff crying in the background*
I'm naked, eating straight Nutella, and listening to "Make you feel my love" on repeat. So no. He didn't ask me out.
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