Bea Arthur died yesterday
You shut your stupid mouth
Betty White is next, I just know it.
Betty White will never die! She's like Dick Clark. Rue McCalahan is next.
so we'll all just be running around naked, basically. and high.
Im interpreting your silence as a silent plea for me to come wake you up. See you soon.
I'm in a trailer park. But I'm not scared. The virgin always lives.
Yeah. Not my best idea. But I'm hoping for the best . And by best, I mean not jail
I am not betting on the failure of any friend that is not you.
i have never been so sexually frustrated as I am right now. I feel like dying...is death an option?
when I die covered in cocaine, hookers, and tequila at 73 years old just remember that I once had a tweet with that many retweets
I mean I've seen her tits but I don't know what her voice sounds like
Stop leaving buckets of wine at my house.
I got a hand job after work. Remember those? From the 90s...
My liver is preforming stress tests.
Yep. The ghost of my sex life is in your house.
I would just like to say that I had morning sex today to the Hamilton soundtrack. So.
She’s a Vegas 8, which makes her an Oklahoma 27
Randomize
