that was a gay-test. you passed.
with flying rainbow colors i hope!
Fact: The drinking you do in college doesn't affect your liver in real life.
Dude its so hot it my room I can't jack off. Its gonna be a long summer.
A guy just walked down the street dressed as Mickey Mouse holding a 40oz. Where the hell did you leave me?
How did it go last night?
Woke up head half shaved and a burrito? So good and bad?
I feel like ass. I'm missing 12 hours of my life and all I have to show for it is an empty wendys bag. Those Shrooms were too much... When do we do it again?
Unless your apartment has 3 am pancakes Im not coming over.
I don't know what I'm more pleased with, the blowie last night or that fact that there's still 20 dollars in my wallet
And then he serenaded me with "Pimps don't cry" from 'The Other Guys'. If that's not love I'm not sure what is
22 is way too old to still be having "thank god I think I'm getting my period" days
That moment when I wear the same thing I did to a motel nooner to my family's Christmas party... Ho Hoety Ho bitches
You danced?!
I just jiggle to the beat like a sexy lava lamp
I tried to bring you in when you passed out on the porch but all you said was that I "ruined your hope ands dreams of becoming an astronaut"
i keep smelling vagina and donuts, which pretty much sumarises this morning. happy birthday.
You and I both know it takes more than prescription narcotics to keep our family down. See you around ten, brother.
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