pretty sure I just motor boated my professor at the drag show
whatever. i fb stalked him and his pic comments are witty. so i'm going for it.
well at that point we were just fucking to keep warm.
so thats a no on the drunken crutches race 2moro
Just realized I lost my social security card...maybe someone else will do something with my life
well that explains the french fry and ketchup packet rolled into the wasitband of my sweats. thank you drunk me.
The cop told you to put your hands behind your back and you slurred "I'm not falling for that again"
She frightens me and turns me on at the same time. She's a keeper
Restraining order pending?
I will kick you in all of your body parts. All at once.
Dude, she doesn't even live here... She just can't eat all our food and masturbate on my dog's couch...
Your cock has been in the back of my throat. Co-worker is no longer a sufficient title. Fix that shit ASAP
Im so drunk and the cops showed up so i ran on all 4's through the woods because i had no shoes hoping they would mistake me for a fox
You know what...ii have the turtles...were together....i love these god damn turtles...
Want to sleep. Also want to see Alex on MDMA doing really stupid shit. Choices...
the funny thing was, all i remember was a liter of vodka and going to oneonta for the night. then 2 weeks later bam, i get a letter banning me from campus for the next 4 years. awesome convorsation with my dad to wake up to.
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