Holy wow, I found all the old poems u wrote me back when we were in looooooooove...just sort of wild to look back on, thought u'd like that
I just got three quarters of the way there before I realized I was way too stoned for class so I bought a smoothie and walked home.
And don't be too jealous. Drinking alone watching a chick flick and masturbating isn't nearly as glamorous as it sounds
i stuck my finger in my ass and it felt weird. but you know. it should be different when a guy does it right?
My mom said "I don't want to fund your drug problem" so she gave me a gift card to the book store. I now have a 420 page book on growing weed.
I just paid a homeless man $20 for the dragon ball Z shirt he was wearing. I need to stop drinking
i seriously just licked my laptop for traces of blow from the other night
I love you, but you should know I'll always ditch you for weed.
I never appreciated sexting until I went to rehab
I need you to know that everytime my toddler does the downward facing dog in the nude I think about the night you and your dude fell in love.
Plus he stuck it in when you were sleeping which would have been the tipping point for me but you art school kids are all liberal and shit
Oh dear. If we're both hearing alien sounds then perhaps they're real.
A shark bit my leg in the Gulf of Mexico well me and the T were banging so look for it in the papers
Haha holy fuck. i dont remember much after pissing on your ex's flaming nude pics.
Dude, some chick came over here earlier and thought my lube was hand sanitizer. She poured it all over her hands.
Randomize
