she offered me iced tea and went to go change.then her dad came in the door.i thought i was on how to catch a predator.
I guess there's some 16 and under softball tournament and they all are at my work. what is a 21 year old to do?
The responsible thing...show them the break room.
where does the pee come out of this thing
is it trashy that while he was throwing up in the bathroom, i was hooking up with his childhood best friend?
At first I was confused when I woke up with shards of glass and pickle brine in my pants. But then I remembered I hung out with you last night.
I woke up with her little sister yelling "she's dead !!" from the bathroom doorway.
You walked in, sat down, looked at the waiter and said, "I'm only having deserts and liquor."
I'm on a mission. But just to make out with him so his relationship collapses and he is single when I come back in April.
Purse pizza: the pizza you buy before the club, and you eat on the train home. I thought you knew me by now!
Now I can say "look me up on Pornhub."
He's passed out. He nodded his head when I asked if he's alive though...so there's that
Should I be concerned you put your last name in my phone as "danger"?
I just really don't even know what I would do with a boyfriend... Like do I just kiss it and then leave it in the corner? Like how often does it eat??
My cat just smacked my blunt from my hand and then put her head in my hand. I don't know how to feel
Dude why can't I remember anything after walking in from my first beer bong?
It was immediately followed by your second, third, fourth and fifth
Randomize
