I left a bag of circus animal cookies in my car all day. they melted together into on giant cookie. this could either be the best or worst thing ever
I think you're the first person to ever call Louisville, KY a "romantic getaway".
Joey just asked me if I ever got anything stuck in my vag.
was it embarrassing when you had to say yes?
You realize it's finals week?
Ya that's the school's fault. St. Patrick's day came first.
He gave her the shocker .. I didn't know people really did that.
Two penises later: I might be straighter than I think.
I think I just accidentally agreed to become a surrogate for a gay couple
SORRY! Pervert came out for a bit. BAD PERVERT! BACK IN YOUR HOME!
I'm gonna hire strippers dressed like the founding fathers.
I don't think a gay three way is the best way to confirm your sexuality.
My inner pteradactyl is also confused.
Sensing a theme here
If alcoholism is a theme, yes.
I just got his Save the Dave and, to answer your next question, NO I AM NOT GOING TO THE WEDDING OF THE GUY WHO GOT DRUNK AND CAME ON MY CHEST.
How my distance relationship is going: he's trying to sext me & I'm stuffing pizza in my face.
He walked upstairs in nothing but his boxers and drunkenly asked my brother for a condom....so much for a good first impression.
Randomize
