U r making out with a 12 year old get ur shit together
I may be the first guy in history to get dome while watching An Extremely Goofy Movie.
I like my landing strip. Makes me feel sophisticated.
What you did last night can never be called sophisticated. I don't care how you trim your pubes.
I'm studying for my midterm by watching porn with Spanish subtitles. Surprisingly the words are still really distracting..
I can already see the regret in her eyes. Amazing night. This city rules.
That would be a dream come true. Seriously, he's like my mount everest, my life's ambition is to climb him.
dude, we need a reunion soon, my vagina needs a deep massage. The kitty is ready to play
Caleb has a beard comb now. Also I have a pube comb now too. May or may not be related incidents
I'm not sure I can continue to condone our having sex in all of your friends' beds
Yeah, so, that moment when the repair guy comes in and you see your cock ring on the counter one second before he does.
Broken leg sex is fun because I just get to lay there
He kept telling me my vagina was a pleasure cave... I ended up just taking it as a complimetn
Having sex with him is like yoga. I do it in the morning and then can't walk for three days afterwards.
I just realized u compared me to a coconut
It’s the biggest dick I’ve ever seen. His IQ drops 25 points when he’s hard because there’s no blood going to his brain
Randomize