I have left a significant number of teethmarks in my prhone. My mouth tastes like tequila and cheddar. Tomorrow already feels fun.
he was so high, he talked to my goldfish for an hour telling him the dangers of overfeeding.
i just successfully used the word "hymen" in a paper...welcome to senior seminar in lit.
Man, jail baloney is awful.
All I did was present the dick. You did the work. That's like thanking the pencil for a test you got an A on.
All the alcohol I spilled on myself must have acted as a disinfectant or something. I haven't showered in three days and I still don't have a staph infection from sleeping on the lawn with you.
A girl pulled up next to me at a stoplight just now, looked around for a second, and then changed her top, bra and all, before the light turned green. New. Hero.
You were force feeding yourself jello and you kept repeating, "I will not surrender"
He drank his beer out of his own shoe. Its his "party trick"
Don't you judge us. Sockets make ideal bowls
Take off your clothes and see if he wants to have sex, that's a good way to find out
I'm currently trying to figure out a way to fill the bathtub up with mashed potatoes so when he comes over he'll know what's about to hit him..
My mom always wanted to raise a classy lady, it just turned out to not be her daughter.
There's a rash on my genitals that would like a word with you.
I have all the porn. Be there soon
Who is this?
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