Even water is tasting like jack daniels
Just wanted to make sure that my favorite hot mess is still alive. I dont need words, just a response of any sort. K hope youre living
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This is sufficient.
Then I realized I was alone sitting on the bathroom floor brushing my teeth at 2am laughing to myself.
But she tried her best to break my penis, so she has a few free passes with me
Everyone is sleeping and i'm sittin here in my iron man mask, watchin chelsea lately and tryin to figure out how to smoke through it.
It's like being the highest you've ever been, then doing about 20 shots, and chasing them with lines of coke. All while laying on the surface of the sun.
I tried to convince the Lobo Card people to take my pic with my sunglasses on because I will probably always be this hungover.
It'll just be like "PENIS HERE". In case you get lost.
ASS. GYMANSTICS. OLYMPICS. NOW!!!
he told me he could still feel the blowjob i gave him last year
wow. THAT good huh
Apparently she almost had an affair at Outback Steakhouse, details to follow when I get home but the apple really doesn't fall far from the tree
Let me know. Show me one boob if yes. 2 if no
Can I put tequila in the fish bowl? I think he wants to party too
all i remember is slapping you in the face with a slice of pizza while laughing maniacally.
I. Love. Skype. Sex.
I think it's just been too long since actual dick has been inside you that you only THINK you love skype sex
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