YOu come back ASAP and we will do whatever you want baby
dude, your ex-bf is on match.com
details on that.
well, his profile doesn't say anything about herpes.
Literally like 10 people walking in my building talking about how much they hate draco
I was at circle k buying gas and this girl in a papa johns uniform comes up and is like " I've got a bunch of extra pizzas. Large peperoni for $5." then she went to her trunk and pulled one out. It felt like a drug deal for a fat person
I just noticed she took the "toys" too. That's how you know when it's really over.
... was I dreaming when we did coke off of the xbox, or did that really happen?
We're going to catch a squirrel this summer
I'm alittle affraid you might be dead, seeing how your work party is in an hour and you haven't answered me? I mean I'm picturing you 1. Passed out in your car covered in fries or 2. On a boat in a box to Mexico covered in coke. Please let it be number 1. And aren't we going to your work party?
Btw had an awesome time last night. Found some blood on my shirt and ear but I'll chalk it up to the tequila shots.
I've entered the world of uncircumcised penises. It's disgusting.
Just walked in and got handed a drink. Good service
I offered the opportunity to grope my boobs for pints. Two girls took me up.
All boys are excommunicated from my vagina until further notice.
she brought her phone charger to the bar this bitch is ready to drink
Just had the biggest masturbatory crisis ever.
What does that mean?
Internet is down.
Randomize
