i know ur right I'm sorry I'm stupid and incompitent look I can't even spell incompetent right! Fuck!
i just ate that cheese stick that was in my purse from last night.
i think he just uses that whole "grew up in a castle" thing to get pussy
if you don't let us come over today i'm not taking the second plan b pill. your call.
well he's currently spooning the coffee table
Nah it's cool, I made him pinky promise me he wouldn't die if I left him passed out in the bathroom.
So many bounce houses so little time
your bra might or might not be a decoration on me and my roomies xmas tree haha
He wouldn't give me a cup of water for my bong so i sat in the drive thru to run up the timer until he gave it to me.
lesson #1 of freshman year: grinding with a sombrero is difficult
Word of advice, don't put your jar if peanut butter in the microwave, blue fire comes out
Doors open. I'm laying in bed watching caddy shack and drinking a vodka tonic.
And I'm out of vodka so bring vodka or 2013 will blow ass
I find him attractive in the absolute weirdest way. Like I need him to do my taxes, but I also feel like I should spill things on him to gain his attention and then lick it off to gain his affection.
He kept screaming "I am the thunder!" when he was riding me.
I swear to God...this day is one great big who's who in the land of fucked uppedness.
Randomize
