her teeth should be alot whiter from all of those blowjobs she gives
we were holding hands throwing up into the same garbage can; if thats not true love i dont know what is .
Dude dan is so baked he taped his remote to the futon so he couldn't lose it again. Come over here
Come on, video tape it. Take one for the team
you convinced the bartender to un-cut you off by letting him touch your boobs whenever you ordered a drink.
Just came out of my room at 8 AM to find 2 pounds of raw hamburger and a half eaten cake strewn across the hallway. And I'm not surprised at all.
If taco bell and midol can't fix her, she's in gods hands now.
I wish they could condense everything I needed, nutritionally speaking, into mike and ikes
My signature move is making guys wonder why they bothered in the first place
You're going to be mad because I got baked, but not that mad because I'm bringing home kfc.
Dude I was walking down the street and threw up in a plastic cvs bag. Tequila wins again.
Car is still out of commission. Looks like it's Grape Nuts and scotch for dinner.
Update - might be back in your neighbor's good graces. She liked the framed photo I gave her of me on the tractor with my business out.
HOCKEY BUTTS AND BASEBALL BUTTS HONESTLY DO SOMETHING TO ME
And for today's main disappontment. I thought I saw a midget with fireworks get on the buss, alas it's a child with cleaning supplies
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