I found your undies. They were wrapped around my leg.
we got a new version of the plan b at the pharmacy now. its called next choice. you would think they would come up with better names for these things.
I took it to a new level. I'm procrastinating taking my adderall. Hate finals week.
He asked if I wanted to leave my bra on while we were doing it from behind bc he read somewhere that all that pounding can be painful for big breasts. THAT thoughtful.
I feel like I shouldn't be doing my banking stoned. But I bought a new bowl. Her name is Sharpe. Pronounced Shar-Pay.
I was told u were the one who could explain to me why i woke up in the running shower, still in my dress and heels
Side note, we are 25 fighting over our sophmore year RAs Drunk facebook attention
She's riding a tiny four-wheeler and has a Dos Equis in her hand. I at least have to meet her.
WHY. COME BACK. TRAPPED WITH ROOMMATE AND FALCON. SAVE ME. I HAVE HUMMUS.
Remember when there was a happier time when people could all hang out together with out the awkwardness of the fact that she stole $1000 and cheated on a brother with another brother !?!??
The lady at target couldn't scan my grocery item and just looked at me and said "just take it. I hate this fucking place". Best munchie adventure yet.
No, the high point was when you stood on a chair and shouted you were the god of tits and wine.
Remind me to tell you about this weekend with them. It was the least fun I have ever had drinking. And I have thrown up pork and beer through my nose on the side of the freeway.
One day when i undoubtedly need an intervention please let it include lightsabers.
I think I can handle that.
Just learned a very valuable life lesson. Never motorboat a cat when they have claws.
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