At my boss' house at a bbq. Had a few beers. Taking a poop - there's no TP...this is my nightmare.
There's half of a squirrel in the bathtub - i figured you'd be the one to go to.
I feel like banging her is an expected thing. But banging you would be like getting a 36 on the ACT.
the only thing coherent you said from what i saw of you is when you were throwing up, i asked if you were done and you just "uh huh you know what it is"
cheating on your boyfriend is the best diet ever, I've barely eaten in days. The guilt is killing me
Our idea of a "deep conversation" was successfully forming complete sentences.
hi sober isdnt real. this is a mass rtoomate taext i thing. bye
AMAZING.
Good. I hope they all got E.Coli from snorting coke off of some homeless prick's asshole.
be ready to rage tomorrow. like naked ranch dressing rage
well i mean, we just followed them into an alien and astronaut party. there was tin foil everywhere
Wanna get mid day margaritas tomorrow if I'm still alive
I'm like, not good at living.
Unintionally got shitfaced at study group this week. The waitress brought out a fishbowl of long Island iced tea. Challenge accepted.
So then edible panties?
Jesus no he likes candy too much, I'd lose a lip
Can I bother you for a second.
You always bother me but go on.
Randomize
