I just am on my way home.. i had 3 and one startd crying and puking.. so they went home. one bitch fuckin ruined it for evryone.. u playin cards?
can you have the cops turn on the gps locator on my phone...i just woke up in a Hooters uniform and I have no idea where I am...
So how was last night?
Let's just say I danced with the devil
Huh?
I'm going to Hell for sure
bahahaha. this guy working at subway literally has someone's name tattooed on his arm, crossed out, and another name below it.
I lined up everyone's pillows and I'm playing Evel Knievel when I jerk off later.
you don't know how close you are to someone till they ask you to shave their ass.
don't worry about the poodle she's always like that. she's like 14 years old and ate a bag of weed when she was a puppy.
We got really high and decided it would be a good idea to wash towels in the dishwasher. I left before I could see the final result.
It was worse than that time I did shots of BBQ sauce and pierced my own ear with a thumbtack
I would say "man cannot subsist on sexting and brownies alone" but I think it's actually possible.
At a point I was just cumming dust last night
You know the party's good when you say "Never have I ever caused an emergency landing" and someone drinks
Do it break your family into faction start a civil war
I had a dream involving the worlds smallest pony, an asphalt volcano, and jimi hendrix. Never smoking 3 bowls before bed again
Ccatlin cimbing thru th sunroof plz come
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