is it odd that your cat looks tougher than you?
i just googled 'classy porn'. high, low, i dunno i just got bored of cum shots.
He probably put up nude pics. He seems like that kind of guy.
she gave me a handjob while we were watching elf.... it's that time of year again!!
drunk sex in a shower = bad idea broken arm
Fuck positive energy. I choose drinking instead,
DO NOT EAT ONE OF DONOVANS WEED RICE CRISPIES. I REPEAT DO NOT EAT IF YOU VALUE YOUR EYE BALLS
I like how I get messages from eharmony at the same time I'm looking for a new vibrator. It's like the powers that be are just trying to make my life ironic.
He just got here and all he's wearing is a cloth over his penis.
I'll uninvite my mom
I'm sitting outside your room listening for sex noises eating pepperoni...slowly
Yeah i was handcuffed to the bed all night but i actually slept like a baby
It was rough. I have dried puke in my hair and I don't know if it's mine or from the girl I met on the ground waiting for a cab.
coughing up blood. I'm leaving for the doctor now. P.S. I just won $350 on the wheel of fortune machine in the casino.
I had to ask him for a dick pic. Do you know how refreshing that was?
Please don't finger me like a jackhammer. I'm a woman not a construction site.
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