You were partners with her mom and you began calling her "the Robert Horry of beer pong" You also kept telling her that she was hotter than her daughter.
I hope you fall in a pool of honey in an immensely populated region of bears.
So when you said you wanted to make a clay replica of my boobs and hang it above your bed you actually meant it?
My last google search was 'bulk asian wives' I don't know either
Her voice kills me. Its the perfect pitch to fuck with my hangover.
Ong my arms are moving wo my consent
Dude that's beautiful. I've never heard of someone smoking with their bunny.
I feel like I have a connection with him. A marijuana-induced-spiritual connection.
I happen to have lost a black t-shirt and the volume button from my phone last night. If anyone finds it. You know what to do.
I just used crown royal bags as pot holders...
Props to you. You took the bet seriously. Making out with her for an hour right after she spewed
Let's be honest, I am pretty sketchy looking.
I cannot lay down. I will throw up my life and your life and the class hamster I had in third grade.
Yes. Ice cream tacos are an important aspect in the bridge of friendship
Anyway, all that to say that tiny penises are a hassle.
I have already been up, showered, had a cup of coffee brought to me, added a little rum to cure the hangover, had sex and kicked him out and it's only 1pm. Successful day so far.
Randomize
