would you consider him our boss?
technically yes
then technically i slept with our boss
I wish you wouldn't refer to your breast milk as "ammunition"
just smoked a bowl with my history teacher. i love community college
I yelled "Coming in hot." before penetrating. Im pretty sure she loved it.
I'm gonna go out in a limb and say living out middle school fantasies is never a good idea
You used the best tools you had at your disposal.
Slutty, slutty tools.
My fridge broke, and apparently the back is missing. The repair guy just fixed it with a pizza box. I didn't ask where the box came from, but it wasn't mine. Reason #20 why rent is cheap.
Hostess is going out of business we'll never survive the apocalypse
Just heard a girl ask "Wait you're not my boyfriend?!" to a guy wearing the Mickey to her Minnie Mouse on my way home. Made me feel better about myself.
It's settled. One of us is going to bang her brother. The world demands justice and he's hot. We'll be the justice league if it were made of alcoholic whores
so third time im replacing the batteries on my vibrator in 2 months #sosingle....on another note though, black beauty is raring to go
She was wearing a grass skirt and a watermelon bra. WATERMELONS.
I'm not saying you're stupid, just that you have bad luck when thinking...
Also. Picked being late to work over the maid finding my vibrator. Life choices....
Puking out the window is really hard when you're the one driving.
Randomize
