p.s. this guy just tipped me with ecstasy pills. is this real life
is it bad if i hope guys are like edward cullen and can read my mind. i could be a whore in disguise.
If i have to listen to his problems about his girlfriend, he should at least let me suck his cock.
You need to tell your booty call to take some sudafed or something. I swear I thought you were humping Kermit the frog last night
OMG stoned with flashing lights behind me, I was freaking out until I realized I wasn't driving my couch
Okay. Did anyone see me spend $1600 at the strip club last night? Or is this someone else's receipt in my pocket?
Next year we will be 30 and no more shots during the week.
I knew it would be an interesting night when he showed up at my house on a scooter wearing a six foot american flag as a cape.
Just do let me go home with anyone especially I a guy with a hair sweater
Batteries died. I don't care that you're studying for the bar. Come over. Bring the law books and study after. I'll even make coffee.
Is 36 too old to fuck a college student? THIS IS BOTH IMPORTANT AND TIME SENSITIVE
Dude, never piss off a hungover boss.
Oh lord. I have no recollection. I just got up. Surveying the damage. Found phone with messages out by pool. Still have not located my top or determined when i stopped wearing it
It's just really funny to hear them talk about March for Life when literally every single one of those girls has had an abortion
What the hell do you do when your fuck buddy leaves to go for a piss naked and 20 minutes later hasn't come back and can't be found anywhere in the house or outside but has left his phone, tee shirt and shoes in your bedroom.
I don't think there is a pre defined social etiquette for a lost naked fuck buddy now roaming the streets.
Randomize
