69 is so not fun when his penis is sporting a 70s hairstyle
you asked a group of latinas stood by the bar to hold a minutes silence for ugly betty getting cancelled. that drunk.
She passed out in my bed last night before anything happened. She felt really bad about that, so she gave me head when we woke up this morning.
the last thing i remember is inserting the sippy stray into the jack daniel's.
Wow, I just sneezed gum out of my nose. Wonder how long that's been up there.
So, I found out he was eating a jolly rancher while eating me out.. Hence the yeast infection.
Quick question: how do I take a nice picture of my ass? I'm asking you because I figure with an ass like yours you're probably experienced.
Can't even walk I haven't tried talking but I probably can't do that either
I sent dad a photo of my graduation certificate from drug therapy class. It was his birthday so it seemed appropriate.
Listen I'm tryna celebrate your divorce. Sometimes that calls for drinking on the toilet.
My vagina needs a break, I had to ice it with a beer bottle last night.
Your final is gonna be as easy for you as getting into straight girls' pants is for me.
I was taking this cougar home in the middle of the night I walked across the hall all naked to take a piss and ran into to some chick from highschool she said no way you are fucking my mom ran into her moms room and started yelling at her
I'm gonna be late for work because i decided to masturbate and forgot to put my clothes in the dryer
R.I.P my virginity. TOD 12:37pm
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