the world took limewire and four lokos away from me in one week....hello depression
It's safe to say that our attempt at trying to fuck in the grand Sierra elevator was a bad idea.
I was taking a bath and he burst in, sat down and started taking a shit. RIGHT BESIDE ME. My lack of privacy astounds me.
I'm going to have to start sleeping with my keys taped to my stomach.
And I can taste the vodka through my ears. Good god.
They made the rule if I caught the ball with my cleavage they would drink the entire beer pong table. I don't think they expected me to actually do it.
I could study for finals and ace all my tests but wheres the fun in that? id rather black out and hope for the best
In a weird way, I don't want to stalk him on Facebook. I want to find out what's wrong with him the old-fashioned way. Is this what it means to be romantic?
Woke up fully clothed in bed sleeping on my purse.....we're back!!!
It is becoming increasingly more likely that my entire halloween costume will be entirely composed of borrowed clothing from the two girls I'm hooking up
I'd have paid money to see Cookie Monster playing with a vibrator
She told me she ate a whole pizza today, and I just wanted to hug her forever.
Of course I have a pirate flag
After I asked for my 6th Gin & Tonic, the look on the flight attendant's face started to make me feel bad about myself.
Guy peeing and puking at the same time in the women's restroom? So impressed that I can't be offended
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