Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
so, just learned that EVERYONE heard pretty much everything last night. my roommates were surprised to learn you're a dirty talker.
Please fuck him. And then let me tell her. And then let me protect you from the knife she pulls from her Ed Hardy purse. Please.
she won't take no for an answer... no matter what language i said it in
I mean I had a leg brace. It would have been irresponsible for me to be on top.
composition of my stomach right now: 60% C8H10N4O2 * H2O (coffee), 20% CaCO3 (pepto bismol/tums), 10% HCl (stomach acid), 5% fried rice, 5% residual adderall. i can do that by percent mass too. fuck you finals.
Do you know how hard it is to maintain a conversation with someone who just told you they put their cat in the fridge on purpose?
Someone got day drunk, but I'm not saying who.
It was me.
When i like your selfie it means one of two things. 1. thats a nice photo, friend. OR 2. I wanna bend you over a table. But youll never know.
I got drunk by myself and ended up listening to Beethoven in the dark.
future reference: when you get a text that says "WARNING: EXPLICIT PHOTOS BEING DELIVERED. VIEWERS DISCRETION IS ADVISED." you always open the attached picture.
I don't know what to do with my life other than going on Reddit and watching porn.
So do I get to ride the beginning of the November stache or what?
are you fucking roseanne barr in there?
While he was going down town Julie brown, I was eating French fries. True Love
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