omg omg i just fucked paul. i need to stop doing this kind of thing.
wait, who's paul?
exactly.
He can't get past my hymen. At least that's what he said it feels like.
last night they convinced you that a sharpie was a new style of chap stick... so when you wake up, you might want to do something about that
you know how they say when you die, your whole life flashed before you? well do you get to see what happened all the nights you blacked out?
It was mandatory to shotgun a beer before we were allowed to eat dinner
Remember that amazing deer? You peed next to that dear..
And by that I mean I told her the plot of the first batman movie as my life and it took her like 20 minutes to figure it out
I don't know what you told him but please make him stop telling me about his new video camera and winking
Hold my feet while i lean out of the window of the truck.
Hey, just wanted to let you know that University Police stopped by and repossessed the stolen laundry basket. And the 8 bottles of detergent.
He wanted to bang in the work van while we were on shift together. He convinced me with "It's like the Scooby Doo van but looks nothing like the Scooby Doo van."
My 12 o'clock class is an all star team of my ex's hook ups
So she was amazing, that's what. Idk if it was the blow or the blowjob, but both my heads are still tingling.
Woke up with a glow stick in my boobs this morning. Must've dominated Sunday.
what are you up to?
it's 8pm, i've already showered and gotten in bed. if you wanted to make plans u should have asked 3 months in advance
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