If she sucks any more cock I swear she will be a spermivore
Do you ever look at a vegetable and think "that would be awesome to shove up my vagina"?
if you don't go to jail tommorow I'll buy you a 40. Motivation.
sorry for making everyone realize you look like bruce jenner
I mean, it's free alcohol, to turn it down would be a crime against humanity.
Packing up everything in the dorm. Silly bands to unused condom ratio is ridiculous.
like when he blacked out and we found him in the garden eating your tomatoes off the vine
Chapter 6 - how to lose your underwear in chicago
This has been your unwelcomed wake-up call, brought to you by exes united. Have a good day, to opt out please type "STOP", to continue but act as though they do not exist please enter "DON'T CARE" for random daily wake up texts by exes united please press "PSYCHO!"
I don't understand why your family and sex lives should EVER overlap.
I know more about this girls vagina than I know about her personality
She found the planted magnum condom..once she figured it out it was too late.
IM SO HIGH RIGHT NOW, IM WHAT ROCKET MAN WANTED TO BE WHEN HE GREW UP. ELTON JOHN CAN BLOW ME.
My boss asked me what was wrong today and I really wanted to tell her I woke up too late to smoke a bowl before coming in
Let me guess you did your hair instead? Has anyone told you about priorities?
I either have a problem or a really good solution... I just ordered my homecoming dress off of a website that sells forplay outfits.
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