Omg. Never. Take a laxative the day you are going on. A date.
week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
...she's taking her top off and singing songs from Anastasia. I swear to God were solumates.
i was taking a dump when this random girl ran in, puked all over my lap, then passed out on the floor
did you bang her?
seriously?
I don't care that you fucked her. I'm offended that once again, you fucked someone with me in the room because you assumed I was asleep.
you set the microwave for an hour telling me that the done sound was your alarm.
I mean besides the fact someone got stabbed, I still had a pretty good night.
Important update! My next door neighbours have a canoe. Repeat: THEY HAVE A CANOE! We are having sex in it before this summer is over.
I may have to steal the boat sober, but I feel that would be harder to explain.
This was the first time I've ever pushed myself until I vomited. Sorry, random couple laying on a dock at 8:30am. I would have picked a better spot so you didn't have to watch/listen to me vomit, but you guys were being MAD quiet. I had no idea you were there.
I haven't been that free with the boobs since I was 19. I'm putting them away for a while.
If you insist
The one guy literally flopped my boob out. Yes I insist.
She's on her period. You don't know what fear is.
We almost ended up sober because of u!!
I would wear his ballsack as a hat if he asked me to
This whole brainwashing thing is easy!
Randomize
