Every time we go downtown I ask myself why we live in Des Moines
some dude is getting blown right outside the bar in his car. reeediculous
class
he's dribbling her head like he's fucking allen iverson
I just realized his fb pic was taken in a public bathroom.
i hate always having to make my eye shadow look really good since my eyes always end up closed by the end of the night in pics
had to bail. she had her cat tattooed on her
2010 has been the year of the Eskimo brother. Let's see how many igloos we can shack in next year
Yes perhaps we are both wrong. And did you call me bj girl?
I'm chugging Gatorade because i drank something called a trashcan and someone named Gianna diamond has my credit card number, and I think I might have ruined my life.
Dude you missed it. This guy in the liquor store knocked over a whole display of 5 hour energy with his face.
I told him he deserved someone better...then I told him he looked very fuck-able wearing nothing but sweat pants. We'll break up in the morning.
Because everyone is allowed one half drunken 7:30 am walk back to campus in a cowgirl costume, right?
My mom just drunk texted me complaining about her genitals smelling like Taco Bell. I really am her son
I wanted one last NYC adventure and I got it. Now I just have to figure out a polite way to wake up the pantless former stripper illegal Russian immigrant street violinist chick currently in a vodka coma in my bed.
Slept on the bathroom floor again. I hope when I turn 28 I’ll stop doing that
He was someone so memorable that I'd completely forgotten he'd existed up to and during the encounter
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