I regularly think about how cool your nickname is
i wonder what megan fox's vagina feels like.
Heaven soaked bacon.
He asked me to sit on his face, but i didnt, for 2 reasons, one, i had just pooped like 20 mins before sex, and two, this could be my future husband. so i skipped on sitting.
dude sorry but u no that when a guys 'likes' ur pic on facebook it only means he was just jacking off to it.
she starting giving me head in the taxi..the driver told her to stop..she looked up, said "I'm the birthday girl", and kept on doing what she was doing.
Just spent the last of my lifesavings on (what i hope is enough of) alcohol. Hello summer.
So am i just your go-to 'i found a tick on my penis' number?
The size of her vagina has nothing to do with the size of her heart bro
czant get you from the arport. sry i found the rum. dan sucks at rumpong jusrt so yo knoqw.
well you don't shave your pubes into a handlebar mustache and keep the party to yourself
I was in the bathroom and I heard a phone ding inside one of the stalls. I really wanted to say, nature is calling, but I was still in my work uniform
And for today's main disappontment. I thought I saw a midget with fireworks get on the buss, alas it's a child with cleaning supplies
Firstly: alligator costume is happening anyway. But I'll see what I can do about the balls.
Next time I pee on a car, I'll text you.
My sensibilities as a lady demand we cuddle on the couch, and THEN have loud, raunchy sex. Idk, what do you want to do?
Randomize
