he told me he had a problem with me going both ways. like what the fuck. what guy says that to a girl? goodbye planned threesomes...
Keep in mind that he's 43, unemployed and living with his parents. There's really not much we could do to make his life worse.
This is ridiculous. It's like playing possible STD Clue, and I don't want to be the winner.
I just found a bag of teeth...
I'm functioning at the level of a challenged walrus.
Maybe you shouldn't go to cosmic bowling, i don't know if cum glows and I don't wanna find out i'm sure his parents don't either.
It would be like if I said I had the cure for cancer and my explanation was I like turtles.
I saw that you sent me a photo and the first thing out of my mouth was "I swear if it's another photo of a dick poking out of a bubble bath"
Your dick is going to fall off. Be careful or you'll get callouses. A workingman's dick.
He made the Waffle House lady get me out of the car. This isn't a joke.
Literally every boy I've dated is now in a somewhat successful band. My vagina has obviously been blessed by the rock gods.
I know it was a good night because I got a lecture from my roommates mom about stranger danger
I looked so sad that Jessica gave me a bar of soap. So that's where I'm at.
Me and mom just bonded over our mutual desire to bang Mark Ruffalo. I'm not sure how to feel about this.
Why don’t they have healthy alcohol yet?
Randomize
